A A Gill goes to Tasmania (from The Times):
No creature has grown so snugly into its name as the wombat, and they have this remarkable poo. Itâ€™s square. Wombats lay organic dice â€“ they have special bones in their backsides for squeezing and shaping and slicing. The reason for the cubic turd is that wombats like to mark their territory neatly, and they lay their personal Lego as high as possible on logs and rocks so that it doesnâ€™t get lost in the grass, and theyâ€™ve made it square so that it wonâ€™t roll off. Nanny nature thinks of absolutely everything.
When I learn to write properly I want to write like A A Gill.